The Inconvenient Truth About Indoctrination

Today, we're going to talk about a topic that might make some people uncomfortable, but it's crucial that we address it head-on. We're going to talk about indoctrination, particularly in the context of the gender-critical movement and the impact it's having on parents and families.

First, let's define what we mean by indoctrination. Indoctrination is the the process of repeating an idea or belief to someone until they accept it without criticism or question. It's a form of manipulation that relies on fear, shame, a lack of knowledge on a given topic, and the suppression of independent thinking.

Now, I know some of you might be thinking, "But wait, isn't that just education?" And the answer is no. Education is about providing people with the tools and information they need to think for themselves, to ask questions, and to come to their own conclusions. Indoctrination, on the other hand, is about telling people what to think and punishing or attacking those who don’t fall in line.

So, what does indoctrination look like in the gender-critical movement? Well, there are a few key signs to watch out for:

1. Black-and-white thinking: Gender-critical groups often present complex issues in simplistic, binary terms. You're either with them or against them, and there's no room for nuance or disagreement.
2. Fear-mongering: These groups often rely on scare tactics to recruit new members and keep existing ones in line. They'll tell you that trans rights are a threat to women, children, and society as a whole, even when there's no evidence to support these claims.
3. Echo chambers: Gender-critical spaces, both online and off, tend to be heavily moderated and curated to exclude dissenting voices. If you question the party line, you risk being ostracized or even banned.
4. Anecdotal evidence: While gender-critical groups claim to be grounded in science and reason, they often rely on cherry-picked anecdotes and personal stories to make their case, rather than rigorous research and data.
5. Us vs. them mentality: Gender-critical rhetoric often paints trans people and their allies as a dangerous "other," a threat to the very fabric of society. This kind of dehumanizing language is a classic tool of indoctrination.

So what does that look like? Well, let's say a parent comes to a gender-critical forum, like pittparents.com, or others that I won’t mention for obvious reasons, seeking advice about their child who has recently come out as transgender. They're confused, scared, and looking for information and guidance. In response, they're given a very specific narrative: that their child has been "brainwashed" by a cult-like transgender movement, that affirming their child's identity is a form of abuse, and that the only healthy and loving response is to reject their child's identity. Some may even advocate for pursuing “gender-exploratory therapy” which is really just conversion therapy with a new label12.

If this parent expresses doubt or uncertainty about this narrative, they may be met with a flood of anecdotal horror stories, cherry-picked statistics, and appeals to emotion that are designed to overwhelm their critical thinking and reinforce the gender-critical worldview. They may be told that they're being a bad parent, that they're enabling their child's delusion, or that they alone must stand to prevent their child from irreversible harm.

Now, I want to be clear: I'm not saying that everyone who considers themselves to be gender-critical is a mindless zombie or a bad person. I am sure there are those who truly believe in what they are saying and doing. But I am saying that the movement as a whole relies heavily on these tactics of indoctrination, and that's a problem3.

It's a problem because it's hurting people, especially parents and families. I've seen too many stories of parents being swept up into these echo chambers, subjecting them to harmful and discredited practices like conversion therapy, denying their identity, engaging in delaying tactics, and finding themselves cut off from their kids. I’ve seen it break families apart and ruin marriages. And for what? Because they've been told that this is the only way to protect their children. And who doesn’t want to protect their kids? So they believe it, they believe they are doing what is best and right for their kid; when in reality, it is them who are causing immense, and even irreversible harm.

But what about that punishment stuff you were talking about earlier? Yeah, well punishment can come in all sorts of ways - they will make an example of you. Well, maybe not you specifically, but as soon as someone talks against the narrative, pushes back on a bad argument, or provides some studies or facts that counters what they want you to believe? They will attack them, block them, or ban them. That sends the message to all those in that space, some who find it is their only support, that speaking up and speaking out will be dealt with swiftly and harshly - that there is no tolerance for those who speak against us. There’s that us versus them mentality at work.

So, what can we do about it? Well, the first step is to educate ourselves and others about what indoctrination looks like and how it works. We need to be critical consumers of information, fact-checking claims and seeking out diverse perspectives. If a study has been redacted, or has been exposed as being seriously flawed, then it’s no good. It needs to be done again or a correction has to be issued, and it needs stands to the rigors of peer review.

We also need to support organizations and individuals who are working to counter this misinformation and provide accurate, fact-based resources for parents and families. Groups like PFLAG4, Gender Spectrum5, the Trevor Project6, and the National Center for Transgender Equality7 are doing incredible work in this space. Find you local PFLAG chapter, get to know the parents there. You might be surprised at how much you will learn and come to understand, not just about trans people, but about your kid, and yourself.

But most importantly, we need to remember that at the end of the day, this is about real people's lives. It's about the trans kids who are being told that they're broken or wrong, the parents who are being fed lies and fear, and the families that are being torn apart by this rhetoric of division and hate8.

So if you recognize any of these signs of indoctrination in your online groups or the blogs you read, I urge you to take a step back and ask yourself: Is this really the kind of parent I want to be? Is this really helping me to understanding my kid and show them love and compassion? Is it making things better, or worse, for my kid, myself, and my family? And who benefits? If it is not my kid, my family, or myself then maybe this isn’t right. Maybe it really was about having another voice amplifying the narrative at how bad all this “gender-woo” stuff is. And who benefits from that? Well the movement only survives if its core tenants are repeated by as many as possible, as often as possible. And who benefits from the movement itself? Well, who is selling you the books, creating the content that stokes outrage, fear, or preys upon your sympathies? Who is asking for subscriptions to their content, donations, and support so they can keep talking and writing? Is that an individual, or a non-profit group?

Keep in mind, there is a difference to supporting say, PFLAG, which is a non-profit9 and uses the money to help parents and kids by providing safe spaces, support groups, and building a community and a substack blog run by an individual or individuals, as the money goes to them, for them, as profit. So who really benefits? What is helping you to be a better you, both as an individual, and as a parent? What is helping you help your kid? Is it the substack authors? Is that following the advice of online people who seem to have a pretty clear agenda?

Or is is the family on the other side of town who showed up with their trans son to a PFLAG meeting, who took the time to sit down with you and talk to you about things people can’t or won’t answer in places like pittparents.com. Where you can ask questions and get answers that otherwise would get you blocked or banned? Where you can get anecdotes from real people about the real effects having a trans kid had for them in their lives, and how your choices will matter moving forward.

So if you find yourself in a space where you're afraid to ask certain questions, where you're worried about being labeled a “TRA” or a “groomer” for expressing doubt or uncertainty, or afraid that you will get blocked or banned for sharing a study, then that's a red flag. That's not a community of free thinkers, that's a community of conformity.

If individuals that are propped up as “gender critics”, “thought leaders”, or stand as representatives to validate your narrative are asking for you to sponsor/donate to them, buy their stuff, or pay for their content, they are not in it for you, or your kid - they don’t care about you. They are in it because fear sells, and they want your money. That is not a community of real tangible support for you and aid, that is a community being exploited and manipulated for someone’s profit.10

So remember, in any healthy dialogue, there's got to be room for disagreement for questioning, for pushing back against the conventional wisdom. If you're in a space where that kind of curiosity or dissent is met with contempt, hostility or punishment, then you've got to ask yourself: what are they afraid of? What are they trying to hide? Who benefits from this?

The choice is yours folks, but I hope you'll choose to take a long hard look around you, and given the options, choose the path of understanding, empathy, reason, and love. Because at the end of the day, that's what we all deserve.

Thanks for reading, folks. Until the next time I can write something, take care of yourselves and each other.